When a foster placement succeeds, it’s because the right support, preparation, and mindset were in place from the start. But too often, placements break down - leading to disruption, distress, and instability for children who have already experienced significant trauma. So, what makes the difference? A key factor is therapeutic parenting—an approach that underpins the Becoming a Fostering Family (BFF) programme and is vital to ensuring sustained, successful placements.
Understanding the Challenge
Fostering isn’t just about providing a home; it’s about creating an environment where a child can feel safe, understood, and supported. Yet, many foster carers withdraw during the assessment process or resign after placement due to the emotional demands of the role. OFSTED’s 2020 findings revealed that 60% of fostering applications were withdrawn before approval - two-thirds of these by applicants themselves and one-third by agencies.
Why? Some found the process too lengthy and frustrating. Others felt unprepared for the level of personal reflection required. And, in rare cases, there were applicants who sought to obscure vital personal history - something that puts both children and placements at risk.
How BFF Supports Therapeutic Parenting
Therapeutic parenting requires deep self-awareness, resilience, and an ability to form strong, secure relationships with children who are more likely to struggle with attachment and trust. The BFF programme is designed to cultivate these skills from the very beginning.
An Interactive and Reflective Assessment Process
Unlike traditional assessments, which can feel fragmented and overly procedural, BFF integrates interactive, reflective learning into its preparation course. The first six online sessions help applicants recognise and begin to develop the self-awareness and relational skills they’ll need to become successful foster carers. This ensures that only those ready for the demands of fostering progress to the next stage - the BFF face-to-face group sessions led by experienced social workers and psychological support teams.
This approach safeguards against the common issue of applicants withdrawing late in the process, having realised only then what fostering truly entails.
Preparing Applicants for Open and Honest Reflection
Fostering assessments require applicants to explore their own histories, relationships, and motivations. While this level of personal scrutiny is essential, it can be daunting. Many applicants struggle with the idea of such openness, but failing to engage transparently can hinder their ability to care effectively and can obstruct agencies from being able to offer the right support.
BFF’s structured reflection process helps applicants understand why honesty and self-awareness are key. By the time they reach the in-depth, face-to-face group sessions, they are prepared for the deeper discussions that will shape their fostering journey.
Reducing Placement Disruptions and Withdrawals
One of the most distressing experiences for care-experienced children is placement breakdown. Sudden moves disrupt their sense of security and belonging, often reinforcing past trauma. Unfortunately, many foster carers resign due to emotional exhaustion, secondary trauma, or feeling unsupported.
BFF proactively mitigates these risks by equipping carers with:
- An introduction to mindfulness-based resilience practices, taught by experts with over 30 years of experience.
- An introduction to therapeutic approaches like Dyadic Developmental Practice (DDP), Mentalisation, and Mindful Mentoring.
- Preparation for the ongoing psychological / wellbeing support and reflective practice, ensuring carers are not left to navigate challenges alone.
Why BFF Is Different
BFF isn’t just another fostering preparation course. It’s a carefully designed programme built by experienced practitioners who understand the realities of fostering. Our approach ensures that by the time an applicant reaches approval, they are not only assessed but truly prepared for the challenges ahead.
The result? Foster carers who are:
- More resilient in the face of emotional challenges.
- Better prepared to build secure relationships with children.
- Less likely to withdraw from fostering, reducing placement breakdowns and ensuring stability for vulnerable children.
Therapeutic parenting isn’t just a technique based on theories of attachment and relational resilience — it’s a mindset, a way of being, and the key to long-term success in fostering. With the right preparation, it can transform not just placements, but lives.
The Becoming a Fostering Family training programme prepares potential foster parents for a successful placement.
